Because I'm not a physician, I can't, of course, prescribe medication. However, I have found, in both a personal and professional realm, that a powerful tool in treating depression is participating in volunteer activity. It can be as simple as serving at a soup kitchen, reading to the elderly, assisting teachers in the school setting, distributing magazines and flowers at a hospital...and the list goes on.
The difficulty when you're depressed, however, can be inertia.
Making that first phone call can be monumental hurdle. And, yet, clients (and friends) report that once the call is made and they overcame their first discomfort with a new challenge, they felt something they had not felt in some time: they were needed. They mattered. They had a contribution to make.
I've related in a previous blog my path to becoming a therapist. Looking back, I'm not certain I was clinically depressed, but I was feeling despondent about my career in advertising. I didn't have a someone special in my life. And I was outside of the US, geographically far away from people I loved. Consequently, I was working hard to "figure out" my life. I was spending alot of time in my head, sometimes spinning in details of my life journey to date: my choices, my talents and shortcomings, my relationships and my loneliness. A friend (who probably was tiring of my constant self-examination) suggested volunteering. Her rationale was sound: You have the time, you're good with people, and the worst that can happen is that they can fire you. So you wouldn't be any worse off than you are now, right?
The first step in that journey was becoming a volunteer at the palliative care ward in a local hospital. The training was great and the experience even greater.
If I had to boil the benefit down to one word it would be: perspective.
When we're trapped in our own heads with our own thoughts, the perspective is short, narrow and limited. When we can interact with others on a personal basis, forgetting for a moment our world and its limitations, we're free to develop an amazing quality: empathy.
The folks at Merriam-Webster define empathy as the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another... When you think about it, it makes perfect sense. It would seem almost impossible to be able to "understand, " "be aware," and "vicariously experience" another's world if we're trapped in our own world view.
Interestingly, the same folks at Merriam-Webster have the following to say about "depression:" ...a disorder marked especially by sadness, inactivity, difficulty in thinking and concentration,...feelings of dejection and hopelessness.... My clients often use words like "stuck" and "spinning in my own stuff."
When a task, service or responsibility becomes about anything but you, your perspective is forced to change--just for a time. But change it must. That's when you "leave your head" and concentrate on the needs of others. It can be a freeing change of scenery.
I remember, several years ago, when my father's best friend, Ron, retired from a lucrative career that was a major part of his life for more than 40 years. After retiring, he became grumpy, withdrawn and generally difficult to be around. His wife, in an effort to simply get him out of the house, insisted he volunteer--anywhere. Reluctantly, Ron volunteered at a local after-school program teaching six-year-olds to read.
It makes for an interesting image. Picture a six-foot-four, 200 pound bear of a man sitting in a tiny little chair, at a tiny little table, holding a tiny little book in front of...yes, a tiny little six-year-old. As the kids learned to read, Ron began to have purpose again. He began to engage others, to laugh, to talk with pride about "his kids," the ones he was teaching to read. His sense of humor returned. He not only became a favorite of the kids, but his long-time friends were glad to have the old Ron back.
Was Ron depressed? I couldn't say. But, when he went from being in charge of a company to having no business influence, he certainly seemed to have lost purpose. It took a six-year-old to bring that back. He went from being "stuck" in his own head to being relevant. And needed.
Will volunteering cure your depression? "Cure" is asking alot. But could it help? My personal and professional experiences say that it certainly won't hurt. And, if things are looking particularly bleak, how can you argue with a change of scenery?
Until later, thanks for listening.
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